Red
Rosie
Sweet
Edward
Buzzie
When I first started working on the cam site, I had one sex toy. A ten-year-old vibrator I christened "Red." Guess what colour it is? It was the only one of my vibrators that survived the great orgasm dust bowl of the 2000s. Seriously, there was not much sex, and definitely not much toy based play for about six years there... It was sad. So very sad.
Anyway, I started working on the cam site and immediately members asked if I had any toys. So I'd say yes and introduce Red. Actually that's when I named him. Before that he was just "the vibe" but now he had a purpose and a personality and a job. So I'd show him off and say that Red and I were old friends. But most members were as underwhelmed by Red as I was. I mean, Red is a workhorse. He's lived through years of desolation and loneliness. He has been forgotten in the recesses of my "toy chest" with batteries still inserted sucking out his will to live. He is rugged, he is adjustable, however he is damn inflexible.
Red is a multi-speed hard plastic translucent red vibrator. He can get the job done, but there is no subtlety to his methods. And he's pretty much awful for thrusting. Which is of course what members want to see unless they are the "just do what you like BB!" types (WHO I LOVE!) But come on, who wants to have vigorous thrusting sessions with a 7" length of hard plastic? 'Cause guess what? I really don't.
So I had to get more toys. Oh the horror.
So I spent a week or more checking out internet sites and online shops and eventually I stumbled across something that took my breath away and I hadn't even held it. Pink, curved, smooth and textured, non-representational (didn't look like a penis), GLASS! And it was in my price range. I watched reviews and thought about finding my G-spot for the first time and had to have it. I mean, I was lusting over this thing like "whoa, Mama wants!" And I had never ever had a non-vibe toy.
Now I found one toy that I wanted, I kept searching. If I'm going to make a shopping cart or wish list, there has to be more than one item in it right? That's what I thought anyway.
I was really looking forward to trying to find my G-spot (yes I know, I've had tons of sex and been masturbating longer than I care to admit, but had never had a G-spot orgasm that I knew of). So I started looking at vibrators meant for that job. And I found one. Purple, curvy and bulbous, highly rated, and easy to take care of. Sounds like a match made in heaven. "Click" right in the wish list.
So then I thought, I have to have at least ONE minimally representational dildo, for the fans you know? I knew I wanted silicone because it is so body safe and better for thrusting. It had to be a good size, but not too big because I didn't want to hurt myself, or my husband's feelings. And it had to be something that I didn't mind looking at. Then I found it. The dildo that made me smile and the description that made me laugh out loud and the shape that made my nethers tingle. The Vamp.
And then because EdenFantasys is so freaking awesome, they threw in a free gift with purchase of yet another vibe. Who am I to say "no" to more battery operated climaxes? I mean really. I'm not made of stone!
So once I had created this list I ran it by the hubby who seemed appreciative of my choices. And the order was placed. Can you imagine what it was like waiting for that order? There was a box full of tingly pleasure on its way to my door. As well as the promise of more paid sessions while working. (Have to keep reminding myself this was really to increase money right? Right?)
So eventually (must faster than I expected), the box arrived. Remember, these toys were like nothing I had ever purchased before. High quality, made to last, well reviewed, and super sexy. My hands actually shook a little when I opened the box. I had promised to play with them with my husband first, so we tried most of them out that night. And fun was had by all.
I've had them all for about a month now and they have their own personalities and names and I love them all.
The glass piece is gentle but insistent. Starts off cold but gets hot and bothered quickly. Feels amazing in my hand when I'm fidgety. And yes, she found my G-Spot. "Rosie" is often one of the first toys I grab, and also a favorite bath buddy on the few occasions I get to take an actual bath.
The purple vibe is named "Sweet" because oh how sweet it is. The name was recommended by a member and it stuck. Often if I don't use Sweet during my online time, I'll give myself a some fun time before heading off to bed, and grab it then.
The silicone dildo is one of my favorites. I never thought I'd say this, but damn I love that thing. "Edward" is so named because the model is called the Vamp and is loosely designed to reference the "Twilight" character in that it is ivory pale and slightly sparkly. I laughed out loud at the description. I cannot stand the Twilight saga but I wanted the dildo so badly I had to have it anyway. And as a joke, I named it Edward. I did run the name "Spike" passed my husband, but he vetoed it, because in truth I would have fucked Spike (from BtVS) into the ground given a chance, whereas I'm not at all interested in Edward. Some perverse logic there, but I didn't fight it because I still get to play with the dildo no matter what it is called.
The freebie got called "Buzzie." Again suggested by a member and it stuck. Also, it is buzzie. And it works. And I love it. And did I mention it is waterproof and likes baths? No? Oh, it does.
So why did I name my toys? Because it is easier to say "grab Rosie" then, "can you please get the glass dildo?" Also for members I think it is easier to introduce the toys by name and then ask which they'd like to see me use. They don't seem to mind. And I get to create complicated relationships in my head with inanimate objects that increases the fun while using them. It reminds me a bit of the relationships I created with my stuffed animals when I was little, but these are much less pure. *wink*
Now if I can just find the perfect dildo to name "Daryl Dixon" I'll never leave my room.
No comments:
Post a Comment