I ended up not going online last night. I just couldn't get it together and instead opted for a mini-marathon of "The Walking Dead" and sleep. I still feel like something the cat dragged in, but at least I know I've rested.
Mondays are always a challenge for me. Even after a nice long holiday break I feel this disconnect in my head from what I would like to be doing and what I need to be doing. My daughter always gets up before I do and lets herself out of the bedroom to go play for a while. Eventually she comes in to wake me and I have to drag my sorry carcass out of bed to take care of her. Which sounds like I don't enjoy our time together, I do, but I'm not a morning person.
If I haven't been as organized as I was yesterday (ha!) I generally have laundry to do on Mondays. And a sink/counter/kitchen full of dishes because everything tends to go to hell on Sundays. Also I have to get back into the mindset of going to work every night from a little past 5 (or 4 on Fridays). No matter what, I always greet Mondays with the bleary eyed attitude that it came much too early.
Today I managed to get myself together enough to do two loads of dishes and make pumpkin custard with my daughter. This would be pumpkin pie if I had pie shells, which I don't, so it will simply be baked custard in the shape of pies. Yesterday I roasted the pumpkins, which we grew in our completely disorganized garden this summer. They had been sitting on my front porch for about a month mocking me. I had to make those sneering orange gourds stop staring at me, so out came the sharp chef's knife and baking pans...
My daughter has been helping my step-mother cook since she was 6-months-old. Getting up to the counter and sprinkling and mixing and tasting is second nature to her. She's actually made more pumpkin pies than I have. So I had to have her help me with the spices. This was actually much more ambitious than I normally am on a Monday, so I feel quite accomplished.
Are you impressed yet? My life is so exciting that making a pair of pumpkin custards feels like a major win. I still haven't vacuumed and I think my living room carpet is growing crops from the trail mix that has been spilled on it. But at some point I will primp and preen and make myself at least marginally sexy and go online and titillate strangers for money. And that's the part everyone finds interesting. Which is silly, because that is no more exciting or valuable to my life than making custard with a 3-year-old. Both are part of who I am, both take my attention and energy, both result in a gain (money from one, yummy food from the other).
I know most people are probably finding their way to this blog because the partially nude picture in an earlier post, but I would hope that you are staying because what I have to say resonates, at least a little bit and explains that the life of a sex worker is a life, just like yours. And probably less exciting on most days.
I liked the part about the disorganized garden.
ReplyDeleteWell thank you. If you saw it, you would realize how very true it is. The pumpkins were growing in a raised ornamental bed next to a weeping cherry. And in some cases, UP the weeping cherry.
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