No makeup

I didn't wear makeup to work today. Hell, I didn't even wear a belt and my jeans are falling off my ass. Didn't style my hair. Didn't make any effort to be seen.

Yesterday, I dressed to the hilt in rocker chick black, velvet platform sandals, plaid sparkly fedora, perfect makeup. I felt like a goddess. I know I'm not perfect, but it didn't matter, I looked good because I felt great.

Today, I want to disappear.

I have friends coming over in about three hours to eat, celebrate the beginning of summer, and just enjoy each other's company.

I am dreading this. But I know their love will help, even though I can't really talk about what is wrong.

The house is clean, food is made, lavender iced tea is brewing. Soon I will have to take a shower, and do my hair and makeup. But right now I am blank, naked, bare.

This is me. Just me.